Thecuriousmail’s Weblog


Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on March 28, 2009

mick20keelty1Rumours are emerging from Thailand that Australian Federal Police Commissioner Mr Mick Keelty was briefly arrested by Thai authorities yesterday. It is believed Mr Keelty was questioned about  two possibly under-age “lady-boys” found in his motel room. Thai police were responding to a noise complaint made by a guest in an adjacent room. The unidentified man is rumoured to have said: “Who listens to Shania Twain anyway?? And that loud too!”  Mr Keelty is alleged to have answered the door wearing only a nappy with his Federal Police identification pinned to it, drinking from a glass of champagne and holding a riding crop.  Thai police became suspicious,  and after entering the room discovered the two possibly under-age lady-boys. A heated discussion is believed to have then followed between Mr Keelty and the Thai policemen. In a racist outburst, Mr Keelty is believed to have called the Thai policemen “chinks” and “monkeys”, and strangely, to have threatened them with deportation. It is believed Mr Keelty was overhead saying many times: “Don’t you know who I am (?). John and I are like this (gesture not certain)”. The patience of the Thai police appeared to run out, and Mr Keelty was arrested. In the course of strip-searching Mr Keelty and removing his nappy, a device was discovered in situ in a part of Mr Keelty’s anatomy. Observers report that it was a large black butt plug  in place in Mr Keelty’s anus. Mr Keelty initially refused to remove it,  and denied any knowledge of how it got there. Australian embassy officials were called to the motel. The lady-boys were removed from the room, and while Mr Keelty dressed in the bathroom a discussion ensued between the embassy officials and the Thai police. After emerging from the bathroom Mr Keelty is believed to have given certain unspecified undertakings and an apology to the Thai police, and he was released.Mr Keelty had been in Thailand for a week attending an international anti-terrorism conference.

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  1. Paul said, on March 28, 2009 at 1:38 am

    Haha, that is very funny and brave. I would mispell his name if I was you. The interweb is capable of some strange things and everything is totally public. Hello,

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