Thecuriousmail’s Weblog

CAPTIVE BREEDING PROGRAM ANNOUNCED FOR THE ENDANGERED AUSTRALIAN SOCIALIST ANIMAL

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on May 29, 2009
Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd

Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd

Australian Prime Minister, Mr Kevin Rudd, today announced a captive

breeding program for the endangered Australian socialist animal.

Population levels of the Australian socialist animal have been declining

for decades, to the point where most experts agree the population is not

viable, with  less than a hundred full-blood animals remaining  in the wild.

Scattered cross-breed groups around the country are also believed to

be unviable.

Mr Rudd’s plans call for all full-blood animals to be trapped and re-located

to special honeymoon suites in the Canberra Hilton.

Mr Rudd noted :”There will be chocolates and champagne available on

arrival, and all rooms have candles, a spa, and a vibrating bed. If this doesn’t put them in the mood,

nothing will!” joked Mr Rudd.

The plan has attracted widespread criticism from various groups who say socialism is out-dated by a world obsessed

with greed, consumerism, and self-interest, and that the extinction of the Australian socialist animal is no great loss.

Supporters of the proposal could not be contacted, as it is believed they are in hiding after an orchestrated hate

campaign  against them had been  initiated.

Former Prime Minister, Mr John Howard, speaking after giving a speech at a Liberal Party fund-raising dinner,  said

he had always looked forward to the day when the Australian socialist animal was as dead as a dodo.

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2 Responses

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  1. Paul said, on May 29, 2009 at 12:39 pm

    Haha. May I volunteer myself for that breeding program?

    • thecuriousmail said, on June 1, 2009 at 7:21 pm

      if you want to. i’m so lucky they’d probably put me in a suite with phillip adams!haha


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