Thecuriousmail’s Weblog

SUPPLEMENTARY TRIVIAL PURSIT QUESTION

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on May 22, 2010

Do you know what a derivative is?

See  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derivative_(finance)

It is a bet, a gamble, speculation, with intrinsically no value of its own, and yet  is by no means one of the more

esoteric financial instruments.

Question.   What was the value of the international derivative market last year??

A)    $600

B)    $600,000

C)    $600,000,000  (600 million)

D)    $600,000,000,000  (600 billion)

E)  $600,000,000,000,000 (600 trillion)

F)    They’re all crazy and why do we put up with their nonsense?

The GDP (the value of all goods and services) in Australia last year was about $1,000,000,000,000 (1 trillion).

Answer.   If you picked E or F you’re right.

Economics in the twenty-first century 101:

To be not so polite, sooner or later, those fools are going to fuck the lives of everyone. And globalization means

that there is an inter-dependency we cannot escape from. We’re co-dependents! on an endless roller-coaster ride.

Let me off.

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FINANCIAL INSTITUTIONS ARE RECRUITING PROBLEM GAMBLERS

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on May 22, 2010

A whistleblower has revealed that a number of financial

institutions, including banks and hedge funds, are actively

targeting recruitment of problem gamblers.

An employee of an executive recruitment firm, the

whistleblower said financial institutions have engaged

recruitment firms to infiltrate Gamblers Anonymous meetings

and evaluate problem gamblers in attendance, with a view to recruiting them into their organizations.

The whistleblower, who did not want to be identified, said financial institutions valued the risk-taking and

ingenuity of compulsive gamblers, and should this recruitment approach be successful, the financial institutions are

believed to next target recruitment from among psychopaths and schizophrenics.

Australian Prime Minister, Brother Number 1 Mr Kevin Rudd, said he understood “that financial institutions

have to be novel to be competitive in an increasing complex international industry”. Federal Opposition Leader and

Grand Inquisitor, Mr Tony Abbott, responded to questions by saying “talk to the hand.” Greens leader, Senator Bob

Brown, said “if it’s true it will give problem gamblers a very bad name.”

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ECONOMIC THINK TANK REPORTS ON QUEENSLAND ASSET SELL OFF

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on May 18, 2010

In Parliament today, Queensland Premier, Anna Bligh, tabled

a report on the public asset sell-off by a government-sponsored

economic think tank.

“The report’s main conclusion,” said Premier Bligh, “is that the

asset sell-off is undeniably to the benefit of all Queenslanders.

The Queensland government represents all Queenslanders, and

the government is going to benefit by receiving money from the sell-off, so therefore all Queenslanders will benefit.

Simple really,”  said the Premier with a broad grin.

Premier Bligh thanked the members of the economic advisory committee for their diligence and persuasiveness,

and joked that no assets were left to repay Queensland’s debt to them for their work.

Premier Bligh rejected outright any criticism of the think tank members or their conclusions.

It is believed the think tank was composed of Eddy Groves, former head of the ABC Learning Centres, a medium

who is believed to channel the late Queensland Premier, Joh Bjelke-Petersen, and a parrot sworn to secrecy.

“Of course I’m glad the government’s decision has been independently vindicated,” the Premier said. “The parrot

had tendered to be critical initially, but then we had him stuffed, and now he’s an ALP member of Parliament. All

good!”

TONY ABBOTT ANNOUNCES NEW HEALTH INITIATIVE

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on May 12, 2010

TONY ABBOTT RUSHING TO BE NURSED

With the Australian Federal election due sometime later

this year, the Coalition has begun to release  new policy 

initiatives in the lead-up to the vote.

In Canberra today,  Mr Tony Abbott, the Federal

Opposition leader,  announced that if the Coalition

won the next Federal election they would introduce a payment

for nursing mothers.

Mr Abbott spoke passionately on the benefits of breast-feeding,  and lamented the decline in the number of

women who breast fed.

“I’m a 53 year old man and I am happy to confirm that I am still breast fed,” said Mr Abbott. “When my mother’s

 boobie comes out, I’m ready to suckle.  I don’t have to be asked twice, that’s for sure! In fact, I think it has in no

small way contributed to my general well-being and compassion for my fellow man.”

Mr Abbott indicated that much to his regret, his mother had begun to wean him off breast milk.

“Tho I have noticed Joe Hockey has an ample bosom,”  Mr Abbott admitted.

GREECE, BEWARE A WORLD BEARING LOANS

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on May 8, 2010

Greek protesters, maintain your rage, take back control

over your lives.

Greek people, what price do the  successive incompetent and

deceitful governments now pay? Or the rich, who indulged in

prolonged and widespread tax evasion?

It is the Greek people who equally own the resources of Greece,

not private companies, not politicians, not financial markets, and the Greek people need to account only to

 each other and the future generations.

Disentangle yourself from the web of political lies  in your happy democracy, expel the unsustainable

greed-obsessed ideology of capitalism.

You have an opportunity to move civilization on to a place where there is a future for it. Maintain your rage, take

back control over your lives.

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