Thecuriousmail’s Weblog

MINING INDUSTRY ATTACKS ‘SUPER PROFIT’ TAX PLAN

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on June 6, 2010

Mining Industry Council of Australia

 In a wide ranging press conference in Brisbane today, the

 Mining Industry Council of Australia attacked the 

 Australian government’s plan to impose a ‘super profit 

 tax’ on mining companies. 

 The Council warned that any such additional tax imposition 

  on the mining industry would cause the orbit of the 

planet to change, with the possibility that the Earth would 

 actually be shot out of the solar system, like an unchewed 

 meatball out of Clive Palmer’s arse. 

 Iron ore, and coal, were nominated by the Council as the next Australians of the Year, in recognition that it was 

 mineral resources that saved Australia from the Global Financial Crisis, and a subsequent attack by killer

 safari suits.

 Council members attacked supporters of the tax as obviously “communists, God-haters, and paedophiles. It’s right

that we make billions of dollars for ourselves for a resource owned by the Australian people. I mean, we take the

risk.  The minerals could run away you know.

“When we say we leave the land after mining in a better condition we mean to mean it, maybe. But we are frankly

getting sick and tired of those people who refuse to bathe in the reflected glow of our pious wealth.

We’re your brand new friend! Go on, believe us.”

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