Thecuriousmail’s Weblog

AUSTRALIAN FEDERAL ELECTION 21st OF AUGUST

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on July 18, 2010

In our increasingly presidential political bout –drum roll please–

ladies and gentlemen, here are the two contenders!

First off, we have the current champ, Julia the Red Widow, so-called because

like the spider, she has been known to consume males, but I hasten to add,

not after mating (no sex for this career woman); only if she perceives you as

a rival, or (rightly or wrongly) as a threat, to the natural progression

of her career and the proper order of things,  does she consume you. Let that

be a lesson to all before clashing wills with Julia the Red Widow.  The even tone

of her voice doesn’t quite hide her disapproval or contempt, or the absence

of true conviction and honesty. You are all potential meals, and she will manipulate you into a position where she

can feed. And she is a fastidious diner.  Strangely, there has been a marked increase in the sales of anti-

nausea medication since Julia has been the champ. Perhaps the strategy needs some tweaking.

The challenger, Tony Tirade, has defied many critics to be in a real

position to defeat the champ. Tony Tirade is well known for landing as

many blows on himself as he does on his opponent, and this may well

determine the outcome of the bout. He would also be in a better

position if he could demonstrate he had at least as much compassion

and charity as a rock. But we all look forward to Tony Tirade strutting

out in his fighting trunks, affectionately known as bugie-smugglers, and it

is our hope that he keeps them on during the entire bout.

And so, in our happy democracy the bout begins between the

cynical political operator and the lunatic conservative. My word, we’re just spoilt for choice aren’t we?

As an aside, it is estimated that there are over 1 million Australians not on the electoral roll who should be.

Voting is supposed to be compulsory. Mmmm, you think they know something we don’t?

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