Thecuriousmail’s Weblog

EXCLUSIVE! I SHARED THE TOILET WITH OPRAH!

Posted in Uncategorized by thecuriousmail on December 15, 2010

A security scare has marred American television personality, Oprah Winfrey’s, current Australian visit. It is

believed security guards had to intervene after Ms Winfrey was accosted by a fan in the toilets at the

Sydney Opera House.

 Mrs M Alice (pictured right) was arrested by police after a

complaint from Ms Winfrey, but was later released without

charges.

Mrs Alice has spoken exclusively to Who Magazine. “I was

in the ladies public toilet at the Opera House dear, when

Oprah’s minders came in and ordered everyone out.  I was in

the far cubicle, and what with my artificial hip, I can’t move as

quick as I used to. And then I got scared, and decided I should

just stay there. I could hear people leave, so I thought I’d be ok.

But I heard a cubicle door close. After a few moments I could hear Oprah talking, on a phone I think. I know

Oprah’s voice because I’ve been a huge fan for years. She must have had a stomach upset, because the amount

of farting noises and such like coming from her cubicle was not very lady-like, not lady-like at all letting it all

hang out.  Oprah must be used to it though, as she continued talking on the phone. Talking to someone named

Hugh. And my, it was a very fruity conversation!  Times change I’m sure, but I don’t think the pope would

ever approve of what she was talking to Hugh about. I tried not to listen of course, as was proper, but what I did

hear kept me blushing overnight dear.

Well, after a couple of minutes Oprah hung up and flushed the toilet. I could hear her dressing you see. And

then she screamed dear! Screamed for help. I heard a number of footsteps rushing into the toilet, and the door

to the cubicle opening, and I think Oprah staggered out.

I then heard a serious male voice say: “You’d better call for back-up. We’ve got a floater!”

I chuckled. I couldn’t help it dear. Oh my, but then was I in trouble! I called out to Oprah to try more fibre in

her diet, but then the police came in. I’ve never been in trouble before, you see dear.”

Who Magazine asked Ms Winfrey if she has now increased fibre in her diet. She gave us a cheerful tumbs up!

 

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